Taiwan Day 5 - Tainan

Next Stop - Tainan 台南
This southern town is the oldest city in Taiwan, and was ruled by the Dutch in the 1600s (you can find a lot of ruins from those days). I absolutely loved this city, probably because I happened to be there during the "Tomb Sweep" holiday weekend and it was so loud and lively everywhere I went. There was a good mix of modern department stores and restaurants, with a ton of traditional temples thrown in between.

Altar of Heaven
This temple is unique because it doesn't have any images of the god. The original temple was built as a temporary measure until a proper temple could be built, 300 years ago. It still has a temporary feel.
Billboards
I found this fascinating, not because I felt the urge to see any of these movies in the run-down theater, but because each of the billboards are actually gigantic 4-piece paintings instead of posters! Do they do this for every new movie?
Matsu Temple - another one
The Matsu Temple in this city had a super gaudy entrance that made me weary of even stepping foot in the place.The inside turned out to be pretty plain, though.People prayed like this in all the temples. Sometimes they held long incense sticks, sometimes white and purple flowers, and sometimes two crescent-shaped red blocks that they held to their foreheads then threw onto the ground to have their questions answered. I watched for a while and couldn't figure out how to read the patterns.
The Official God of War Temple (Sacrificial Rites Temple)
I happened to be there during a service and from the name of the temple half-expected to find some kind of blood sacrifice on the altar. To my relief, it was just a guy giving a sermon while the massive crowd intently listened.
Chihkan Towers
This was a Fort back in the day (the Dutch day) to guard against invasion and when the Chinese took over they made it look real Chinese. There was a partially excavated entrance at the base that they left buried, in fear of causing the upper portion to collapse.The nine tortoises carried slabs covered in intricate Chinese writing. Too bad there wasn't an English translation included.I would have spent more time just relaxing in the park if I had more time, but there were too many other things I wanted to see!
Pig or Dog, you decide.
Dongyue Temple
The god here is in charge of deciding whether you go to heaven or hell, and the second chamber was apparently the path through hell. In hell, you can have the pleasure of hanging from a hook in your chest.Or having your stomach opened with a knife.Or having someone grind twigs into your eyes.Or being forced to drink boiling water.Or many other amusements covering the walls heading into the third chamber.

Lady Linshui's Temple
The front looked like any other temple, with ladies in the street selling flowers for you to offer at the altar. In the back there was some kind of ceremony going on. Four men held a portable shrine up to the altar, and another man held a chicken by its wings. Another man held a goblet under the chicken's neck. He had a long blade in his other hand, held it to the chicken's neck, and I ran out trying not to think of what happened next.
Food
It looks like chicken, but isn't. This vegetarian restaurant used wheat gluten to make it look like meat, and strangely feel like it, too. I'm not sure how I feel about making vegetarian food as meat-like as possible.
Parades
People were throwing firecrackers into the streets all day (and sometimes in front of passersby) and I'm positive I now have permanent hearing loss. I kept running into little parades everywhere I went. It was pretty dangerous; none of the roads were closed off and mini-parades hugged the edge of the road while motorbikes sped past. Eventually I saw someone holding a flier with the parade information and peeked over his shoulder. It was all in Chinese, what'd I expect? There were hundreds of groups listed. I think every temple, important family, artistic circle, and religious affiliate got a group together to take part in the event.While exploring the city I realized that the groups were following a set route that allowed them to worship at each temple, each in their own way. Some groups had dancers perform in front of the main shrine for several minutes with fans and swords, some had musicians that fervently beat on drums and cymbals, some carried portable shrines and violently swung them this way and that as if the shrine bearers were having seizures.Some groups carried ornate wooden structures that didn't seem to have any religious significance, making me wonder exactly who was taking part in the festival.Most of the groups carrying a shrine housing the image of a god did a strange two-step that swayed the shrine back and forth and made the streamers bob up and down violently. The beams were suspended by ropes to give the shrine extra bounce.When night fell, people got more rowdy and started lighting aerial fireworks in the road. Pedestrians (like me) had to keep an eye out for guys running away from boxes that spit out dozens of haphazard rocket-type flares. More than once I had to desperately flee from fireworks that had just been lit.The parades had started before I left the hotel at 9am, and were still going strong when I went to bed at midnight. Do people even sleep during Tomb Sweep Weekend?

Bar?
I didn't go in, but people were turning sideways to squeeze into this space between two buildings. Only one person could fit in there at a time and a few meters down I could see a door on the left. I should have gone in just to check it out, but my legs (and for some reason my back) were absolutely killing me.
Hotel Room Service?
When I got back to the hotel there was an elderly man sitting downstairs. I got my key from the front desk and he followed me into the elevator. He said, "I introduce you girlfriend." Um, no thanks. He was a friendly old guy, and I could only politely decline. Must have been like 90 years old. Just goes to show that you're never too old to be a pimp.